Christmas Without My Father

Hi papa,
How are you?
It’s been ages since I wrote you letters. Remember in the younger days, when you have to leave us to another provinces and places because of your work? Since having telephone was very expensive, writing letter was our only way to communicate to each other.
Most of the time, I told you about how I miss you and sent you my drawings. And now, here I am posting this letter to you on my blog.

Pa, this year will be the first time me and mama celebrating Christmas without you. December is always our happy month together. There were delicious meals for my birthday and then followed by Christmas and New Year. We never exchanging gifts, perhaps because you and mama didn’t want to make it as a habit.
One thing I remember when you pretend to be Saint Claus and giving me so many chocolates as Christmas present. We put our Christmas tree near the window because I hope it would be easier for Saint Claus to put the present. In the morning, I didn’t want to look at the tree for fear there are no present. Did you remember pa? You then said to look under the tree and I was so happy to find them. Of course, I didn’t know at the time that it was you who put the presents under the Christmas tree.
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Then years gone by, you and mom were getting old and often sick. Until that final fall in your own room that took you away from us. Forever…
On Christmas eve, we usually went to the church together. We were together as well when the bomb exploded in front of our church. We were together last year, sang Silent Night with only candles to shine inside the church. And then we went home, enjoying our dinner and talk until midnight then we said our prayer. Nothing fancy but just being together as a family. I miss that moment, when you hug mama and me and wishes Merry Christmas. I will never have that moment again.

 

Tonight, I send you my prayer that may you rest in peace. That you may forgive me for dissapointing you. That you will always loves me no matter what…
Merry Christmas papa, from me and mama.
I love you always…
Note: I also posted this on my other blog Ria The Chocolicious
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